“I don’t either. Danny, I really am sorry you got hurt in all of this. I never wanted to cause you any pain and when you broke up with me, I felt kind of relieved. I couldn’t have done it. We would still be planning our wedding and I would be in love with someone else. Thank you for being the strong man I needed you to be and letting me go.”
“Mira, I didn’t let you go. I just opened the door for someone else to love you the way you deserve to be loved. You’re always in here.” I point at my heart and reach out to hug her. She fully accepts the embrace, even returns it.
“I’m so happy we’re still friends. I always want you in my life.”
“I’m never going anywhere, I promise.” Mira’s eyes light up and she starts to giggle.
“You know how I love your promises.”
“Yeah, Pea, I know.” I hug her one last time as Skylar’s walking out of the bedroom. I haven’t called her Pea in months and the smile on her face melts my heart. We’re almost back to where we should be.
“Hey there, hands off my woman,” he jokes. Skylar knows he has absolutely nothing to worry about. I think he likes to screw with me, though.
“She’s all yours man.”
“Yeah, she is.” Skylar looks at Mira the same way she’s looking at him. He picks her up off the couch and kisses her less respectfully so I turn away, still not able to watch them like that.
“Yeah, I am,” I hear Mira whisper.
Three months earlier
Taron f**king Walker is all mine tonight. Jacoby pops into my mind and I try to push him aside, but I can’t help feeling a little guilty. I know if the situation was reversed, I wouldn’t be cool with it. On the other hand, if he had a problem with me coming, knowing I was going to meet the band, he should have spoken up. But he didn’t. He didn’t say shit.
Rolling my eyes, I remove my arm from Mira’s death grip and they walk toward the exit. Mira looks back at me, pleading with me to save her. Nope, not tonight. I said it wouldn’t be too long before I did something. Maybe those two will get their shit together. Me, I’m about to get some one on one time with a sexy singer.
The bouncer, Dave takes me back to a room where the band is supposed to be. As soon as he opens the door, I see Taron. He takes my breath away. Up close, he’s more than sexy. He’s magnificent. The devilish look in his eyes tells me that he’s about to give me a night that I won’t ever forget. Taron’s talking with other band members so I take matters into my own hands.
Walking right up to him, interrupting his conversation, I grab his hand and lead him out of the room into the hall. I have no idea where I’m going, but I’m getting him to myself. It’s high time I show him exactly who Kylee Anderson is and what she’s capable of.
When I lead down us a wrong hall, Taron has no problem redirecting us to where he wants me. Walking into a secluded room, almost as if he knew exactly where he wanted to go, we crash together.
His lips are soft and moist and he smells like pure man. His hair is still damp from being on stage. When I grab his head, pulling him deeper into the kiss, I try to take control. I battle his tongue but he keeps coming out the victor. Pulling out an old trick that has always worked in the past, I tug his bottom lip through my teeth and gently suck. Taron immediately pulls backs and starts pacing the room.
“Fuck! I can’t get her out of my head!”
Wow, that wasn’t what I was expecting. If I wasn’t so sure of myself, I would have thought that it was me he didn’t want to be with. How is this guy, of all guys, mind f**ked over some girl?
“Who has you all twisted? Damn.”
He turns to face me, looking apologetic. “It’s just a girl that has f**ked me over and I can’t take anymore of the memories that pop up. She’s everywhere, except in my f**king arms. I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have brought you back here.”
Jacoby flashes in my head. I kind of know how Taron feels. Jacoby hasn’t f**ked me over, but he is so passive about our relationship and it annoys me. I have always felt wanted or needed by all the other guys I’ve been with but Jacoby doesn’t make me feel anything worth feeling. I really like him and can see a future with him, but not if he’s not interested in anything more than this casual arrangement we have now.
“Don’t be sorry. I wanted to meet you, and I don’t mind listening to you and your girl problems,” I tell him. I can see he’s miserable and it hurts my heart. A man this beautiful shouldn’t be twisted. She must be some kind of amazing. I should be jealous but I can’t help but feel for him and want to help.
“Huh! Problems! That’s hilarious. She has me so messed up that I can’t even see straight. My life is just a daily boring routine since she left. It pisses me off that I can’t seem to get over her,” Taron says, finally sitting down. The pacing was driving me nuts.
“You should go find her.”
“I know where she is, but she doesn’t want to see me.”
Have you seen this guy? There is no way that this girl doesn’t want to see him. This goes a lot deeper than that. He must have done something to her.
“You sure about that? If this girl tied you up this tight, she must feel something for you, or she is just a huge bitch for leaving you. Did you cheat on her?”
“I didn’t even consider another girl when she was with me. Hell, I can’t even get with a girl since she left me. Fuck my life.”
That’s bad, f**k your life, I think to myself but give him some actual advice he can use. “Like I said, you need to go find her. Life is too short not to go after what you want in life. You have to fight for her if she means this much to you,” I say, finally willing to take my own advice. I’m going to call Jacoby as soon as I leave here. It’s high time we have a discussion about our arrangement. I’m tired of just being a play thing when he wants it.
“Yeah, she is going to be in New York City tomorrow at the same time that we are there. Maybe I need to go see her. Kylee, I’m sorry that you had to deal with my moodiness. I really didn’t mean for this to play out like this.”
“It’s all good! I got to make out with a rock star. You can message me anytime you need to talk. I’m just happy I got to meet you. Your band is really amazing and you’re kind of cool, too,” I respond, trying to lighten his mood.
“Well, thanks. I’ll make sure security gets you home safely,” he says leaning over and giving me a friendly hug. I’m glad it didn’t go any further.
Leaving the venue in the cab that Taron’s security put me in, I pull out my phone and dial Jacoby.
“Hey, it’s me,” I say, opening one of the most important conversations in my adult life.
“Hey, what’s going on?”
“Nothing, what are you doing? Are you busy?” I have never let any other guy take up so much of my time before. Yet with Jacoby, all I want to do is give him more.
“Actually, I am. Can I call you back?”
“Yeah, that’s cool. Bye.” I hang up the phone and debate on telling the cab driver where to go. After about ten minutes of waiting, on Taron’s dime no less, I decide to have the driver take me to Jacoby’s house.
I hate leaving my car at the concert, but what else am I going to do? Mira’s off somewhere living the dream with Skylar and won’t be home for God knows how long. At least if I’m with Jacoby, I can catch a ride in the morning.
Pulling up to Jacoby’s large colonial, I see his car in the driveway accompanied by another car I don’t recognize. I ask the cab driver to wait, just in case he’s in the middle of something and really can’t take me back to my car. Getting out of the car, I adjust my skirt and fluff my hair, making myself as alluring as possible. There’s one thing that I know how to do better than anyone else I’ve ever met; be sexy and I use it at every possible turn.
I grab the iron door knocker and bang it against the plate. I wait a moment for a response before I ring the doorbell. You can guess my surprise when a tall beautiful blonde answers the door.
“Hello, can I help you?” The woman asks, dressed in a white silk robe that flows all the way down to her ankles. Her brightly painted toe nails obvious in the color contrast.
Making my way back up to look her in the eyes, confident in my own beauty, I answer, “Yes, I’m looking for Jacoby. Can you get him please?”
The blonde smiles at me, blue eyes sparkling at the mention of Jacoby’s name. My brain is sending red flashing lights with the words “danger” blinking every few seconds straight to my heart, but I don’t back down.
“Jacoby, sweetheart, can you come down here please?” What the mother fuck? You’ve got to be kidding me.
“You know what, I can wait and talk to him tomorrow. He did say he was busy but I figured he might want some company. Apparently he already has some.” I pivot on my heels and make a beeline straight for the cab. Thankfully he’s still there and he was given enough money to wait on me all night, if need be.
The only person I know in the vicinity is Marisol and she’s always up for company. I give the cabbie the address and lean back in the seat to think of exactly how this night went wrong.
My phone starts glowing in my lap, indicating that I have an incoming call. Seeing Jacoby’s name on the screen makes my blood boil. “Your girlfriend not enough for you?” I mumble to myself, putting the phone back in my purse.
There is one thing that Kylee f**king Anderson does not do and that’s share. If I want him, he’s mine. If I f**k him, he’s mine. If he shows the littlest bit of interest, he’s mine; for as long as I choose to have him. I do the throwing away around here. I don’t get used and then set aside to come back to when you’re bored.
Jacoby Roberts has another thing coming if he thinks I’m going to sit idly by and allow him to dip into this posh p**sy while he’s f**king half of Wayne County. No sir, not on my watch. If casual is what he wants, casual is what he is going to get.
“Jacoby, get off of me. I can’t breathe,” I fuss. After an hour long f**k session, I’m out of breath, thirsty and have to pee. I’m not a damn mattress and shouldn’t be laid upon.
“Sorry, Ky. That was amazing.” No shit, Sherlock, it’s always amazing. Have you seen me?
“Yeah, it was good. Come on, I have to get going. I’m meeting Mira in an hour to help her pack up to go to Skylar’s for Christmas and do the usual holiday things with them.” I don’t know why any of this is his business, but I have to tell someone.
“Wow, that sounds like fun.” Jacoby rolls off to the side allowing me room to go to the bathroom.
I get out of bed, grab my clothes and walk straight into the bathroom, letting Jacoby stare at my nak*d body. I know I’m sexy as hell and I use it against him every damn time. He’s probably hard and ready to go again. Not gonna happen.
After I handle my business, I walk back into the bedroom fully clothed to see an almost sleeping Jacoby.
“What are you plans for Christmas?” Jacoby asks.
“I’m doing Christmas tonight with Mira, Danny and Skylar. They’re going back home for Christmas Eve and Christmas Day. The day after I have Trevor and Amy’s wedding but then I’m free. What’d you have in mind?”
Jacoby suddenly looks lost in thought but then comes to, “I was thinking we could do something for Christmas. You know, together.”
Well, slap my ass and call me Jenna. What the fuck?
“Hey, don’t forget, this is casual. There’s no need for holiday time or any time that doesn’t involve you f**king me until I can’t walk straight. Let’s just keep it light, okay?”
Jacoby is burning holes through me, probably trying to debate what he wants to say next. What finally comes out of his mouth leaves me shocked and unable to move.
“What if I don’t want this to be casual anymore? What if I want more?”